If there is something that frustrates me is doing something and ending up in the same place. I mean after all that work, I should be somewhere different, I should have grown or something…I know many of us have been in such a place, wondering why we are just doing rounds on the same mundane spot? Promising ourselves to do better next time and yet we still go back to ….SQUARE ONE!
Recently I found myself in such a position. I could not help feeling worn out…I mean I was still standing at the same spot I was standing a year ago- what have I been doing? Well, I have been doing something, the same thing, with the same results each time…I know am not alone, we rewind our genius ways waiting for salvation somewhere but really…who lied to us that if we do the same thing we will get different results? Trying out a different way may help…it may not necessarily work but it is worth the struggle. To me this is a serious challenge, the old way seems so secure, I know how to do it even with my eyes closed, and a sweet sense of security lies within old methods…however the rude awakening of the backfired results is never interesting.
This time around I am searching for different results. This is a big risk, I may lose the security I so cherished, but I may gain what I never thought I could have. Maybe you share this with me, being stuck in a rut. I challenge you to do it differently- completely differently might I add. Let’s not go round square one anymore. However it goes we are set to learn something new…I look forward with faith and strength…different approach=different results.
If all goes well you will have discovered the right method, if it does not go well, at least you have known how not to do it….cheers
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
ACHILLES' HEEL SYNDROME
For those who know me a bit well, they know I shudder at the thought of asking for directions in town. To some this is a simple task, but to me – no way! I can almost feel myself sweating should I have to do that. I cannot count the number of times I have gotten lost in some corner in town simply because I couldn’t ask. The number of times I have wondered about for hours on end looking for a building that happened to be just around the corner is countless. As I turned a year older in January, I realized the power of weaknesses….
In life heroes were brought down by their weaknesses, we know of Solomon and his many women, David and Bathsheba, King Ahab and his love for complements…all great men and women do have their Achilles’ heel. For anyone to bring us down, they just need to focus on our weaknesses. It is these weaknesses that have sold out many of us even in our own personal lives. We tend to concentrate so much in what we are good at and keep painting this near perfect image of strength and unshaken ability. The truth is, even the strongest of men do have their points of weaknesses.
The wisdom for this year for me has been learning that no matter how strong one is they can always be tipped over by their weaknesses. I don’t know where your weakness is but my suggestion is get to know it, get to master it. You can never really be 100% strong but you can learn how to handle your weaknesses. We lose too much in this life because of our weaknesses, yet the sad truth is that we gain less for our strengths.
This is not a trip for the faint at heart. It may require some deep searching of self, some unimaginable and painful admissions (worse than the one I have just made) and at best some cold hard truth. However this is a trip set to save us from destruction, from the loss of all that we struggle to build. Maybe you should take a moment to think about this. Don’t waste time looking at how to strengthen your strengths while the enemy is busy looking at how to break you apart with your weaknesses.
A while back someone said to me, you can never lie to yourself, the devil and God. This is no easy task (especially for those of us who don’t like admitting fear/defeat) but it is bound to be life saving. For me, God forbid the day I will miss a great opportunity simply because I got late wondering around instead of asking for directions. A chain is only as strong as its weakest link – how strong is your weak link?? This is a lifelong project, even for me it will take time for me to comfortably ask for directions, but the thought that it could be my Achilles’ heel, my weak link…then I have to do something about it. For the remaining part of the year become much stronger by facing your weaknesses in the face and dealing with them…walk this journey with God-and a friend if you may, it is worth the steps…
In life heroes were brought down by their weaknesses, we know of Solomon and his many women, David and Bathsheba, King Ahab and his love for complements…all great men and women do have their Achilles’ heel. For anyone to bring us down, they just need to focus on our weaknesses. It is these weaknesses that have sold out many of us even in our own personal lives. We tend to concentrate so much in what we are good at and keep painting this near perfect image of strength and unshaken ability. The truth is, even the strongest of men do have their points of weaknesses.
The wisdom for this year for me has been learning that no matter how strong one is they can always be tipped over by their weaknesses. I don’t know where your weakness is but my suggestion is get to know it, get to master it. You can never really be 100% strong but you can learn how to handle your weaknesses. We lose too much in this life because of our weaknesses, yet the sad truth is that we gain less for our strengths.
This is not a trip for the faint at heart. It may require some deep searching of self, some unimaginable and painful admissions (worse than the one I have just made) and at best some cold hard truth. However this is a trip set to save us from destruction, from the loss of all that we struggle to build. Maybe you should take a moment to think about this. Don’t waste time looking at how to strengthen your strengths while the enemy is busy looking at how to break you apart with your weaknesses.
A while back someone said to me, you can never lie to yourself, the devil and God. This is no easy task (especially for those of us who don’t like admitting fear/defeat) but it is bound to be life saving. For me, God forbid the day I will miss a great opportunity simply because I got late wondering around instead of asking for directions. A chain is only as strong as its weakest link – how strong is your weak link?? This is a lifelong project, even for me it will take time for me to comfortably ask for directions, but the thought that it could be my Achilles’ heel, my weak link…then I have to do something about it. For the remaining part of the year become much stronger by facing your weaknesses in the face and dealing with them…walk this journey with God-and a friend if you may, it is worth the steps…
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
THE ESSENCE OF LEADERSHIP.
it baffles me just how much people want to be leaders, to be in control, to own the system yet few people ever realize what leadership means. personally i happen to be passionate about this topic and i am unable to stomach bad leadership in myself and others. if i am under your leadership, just know you are under a microscope.
you see leadership goes far beyond giving orders and controlling. it is about influencing and charting people in the right direction. my best example of a true leader was Christ himself, before he asked his disciples to do anything, he showed them how, he led the way. he not only led in word but in character, and that's what leadership is about-character.
the only way to truly lead is through example, any other means is defective and inappropriate. if you cannot live by your own word and demands how then is another person supposed to be influenced by you? the truth of the matter is we remember more what people do rather than what they say.in essence people respect the leadership of character,Jesus showed us how to do it. be the first to do it then ask those under you to follow suit...it makes all the difference.
the main difference between good leadership and bad leadership is that good leadership is so well structured that the leader himself/herself is willing to follow the path they set while bad leadership is so distorted even the leader fails to fall under his/her own word. bad leaders tend to hate their own kind of leadership. do you think a controlling person would ever want to be controlled? (bad leadership right their folks)
wherever you are,whoever you are, wherever you lead, whoever you lead make sure you remember what leadership is all about. good leadership is one which even the leader is willing to fall under anything else is a distorted version. it is your example that leads, your words are just supporting characters.it is not fit to be a weak leader not in any place,you must pay the price of leadership and lead.lead by showing others the way. you think you want to lead? pay the price for leadership and you will be a true leader...
you see leadership goes far beyond giving orders and controlling. it is about influencing and charting people in the right direction. my best example of a true leader was Christ himself, before he asked his disciples to do anything, he showed them how, he led the way. he not only led in word but in character, and that's what leadership is about-character.
the only way to truly lead is through example, any other means is defective and inappropriate. if you cannot live by your own word and demands how then is another person supposed to be influenced by you? the truth of the matter is we remember more what people do rather than what they say.in essence people respect the leadership of character,Jesus showed us how to do it. be the first to do it then ask those under you to follow suit...it makes all the difference.
the main difference between good leadership and bad leadership is that good leadership is so well structured that the leader himself/herself is willing to follow the path they set while bad leadership is so distorted even the leader fails to fall under his/her own word. bad leaders tend to hate their own kind of leadership. do you think a controlling person would ever want to be controlled? (bad leadership right their folks)
wherever you are,whoever you are, wherever you lead, whoever you lead make sure you remember what leadership is all about. good leadership is one which even the leader is willing to fall under anything else is a distorted version. it is your example that leads, your words are just supporting characters.it is not fit to be a weak leader not in any place,you must pay the price of leadership and lead.lead by showing others the way. you think you want to lead? pay the price for leadership and you will be a true leader...
Thursday, August 5, 2010
HABITS WE MUST UPROOT
So we are happily back from the whole katiba vyb. as Kenyans I am proud of the peace we kept, I wasn’t sure it was going to work… so far so good. Anyway, judging from the elections that have gone on there are a few Kenyan habits we must uproot if we are to go forward.
1. It’s not about winning but about integrity.
You see the major reason there was instability in 2007 is because the people were so fixated on winning they forgot human life. It was, ‘our man must win by all means’. For this reasons we as Kenyans created a man eat man society where there must be a loser and a winner and did I mention the winner must call the shots in this country? When you want to win so badly, you lose your mind in the process whether you win or lose, u will crack. When you are driven by integrity of choice then you are able to work best with whatever the outcome and for me I think this is what this country needs. Instead of forever crying foul or trampling each other to win, working with integrity shall surely save us.
2. Last names are just that…last names.
So what if you are a njoroge, otieno, chepkemoi, a mutiso? Is that any indication of who you are? In my world that just identifies you, period it doesn’t make you who you are. I still dream of the day this nonsense of Kikuyus this, wajaluo that, kalenjins this wakamba that will end and we can look at each other as kenyans. Honestly where has that backward way of thinking taken us in the last 47 years...er NOWHERE!!I will agree there is some tribalistic attachment to the way things were done in this country by the previous regimes of government but like mahatma Gandhi said “an eye for an eye will make India blind” so let’s stop making Kenya blind!!We must not pay back for the previous regimes.
3. Crowd mentality
With all due respect Kenyans think together, like a pack. No wonder disagreeing with someone may earn you a black eye as you are seen as a non- supporter. Look we all have our opinions, so what if we think differently? It will not make the ugali in my stomach to taste better if I side with you. We must learn to make choices for us and by us regardless what the crowd is busy engineering.
4. Sisi ni watu way of life.
This must be the most ridiculous one kabisa. People please it has to stop being about following a certain personality to following virtue and integrity. We put leaders in place not the other way around. Judgment must be based on what we think is right not this pragmatic “kama nani amesema, ata mimi nitasema” surely? We must be better decision makers. I don’t know how any better I can put that.
5. They will bring change
Who’s they? It’s you initiative to do something where you can. If you are waiting for ‘they’ to do it, wake up and smell the coffee, ‘they’ has not been doing it for many years don’t imagine they will start now. The recent referendum was one I am proud of. Regardless of the winner the fact that Kenyans turned up to vote was simply a huge indication of initiative. Better yet a larger percentage of the population actually read the constitution…at least all hope is not lost; we might get out of this rut sometime….
Disclaimer : this post was an expression of thought not a campaign for either side.
1. It’s not about winning but about integrity.
You see the major reason there was instability in 2007 is because the people were so fixated on winning they forgot human life. It was, ‘our man must win by all means’. For this reasons we as Kenyans created a man eat man society where there must be a loser and a winner and did I mention the winner must call the shots in this country? When you want to win so badly, you lose your mind in the process whether you win or lose, u will crack. When you are driven by integrity of choice then you are able to work best with whatever the outcome and for me I think this is what this country needs. Instead of forever crying foul or trampling each other to win, working with integrity shall surely save us.
2. Last names are just that…last names.
So what if you are a njoroge, otieno, chepkemoi, a mutiso? Is that any indication of who you are? In my world that just identifies you, period it doesn’t make you who you are. I still dream of the day this nonsense of Kikuyus this, wajaluo that, kalenjins this wakamba that will end and we can look at each other as kenyans. Honestly where has that backward way of thinking taken us in the last 47 years...er NOWHERE!!I will agree there is some tribalistic attachment to the way things were done in this country by the previous regimes of government but like mahatma Gandhi said “an eye for an eye will make India blind” so let’s stop making Kenya blind!!We must not pay back for the previous regimes.
3. Crowd mentality
With all due respect Kenyans think together, like a pack. No wonder disagreeing with someone may earn you a black eye as you are seen as a non- supporter. Look we all have our opinions, so what if we think differently? It will not make the ugali in my stomach to taste better if I side with you. We must learn to make choices for us and by us regardless what the crowd is busy engineering.
4. Sisi ni watu way of life.
This must be the most ridiculous one kabisa. People please it has to stop being about following a certain personality to following virtue and integrity. We put leaders in place not the other way around. Judgment must be based on what we think is right not this pragmatic “kama nani amesema, ata mimi nitasema” surely? We must be better decision makers. I don’t know how any better I can put that.
5. They will bring change
Who’s they? It’s you initiative to do something where you can. If you are waiting for ‘they’ to do it, wake up and smell the coffee, ‘they’ has not been doing it for many years don’t imagine they will start now. The recent referendum was one I am proud of. Regardless of the winner the fact that Kenyans turned up to vote was simply a huge indication of initiative. Better yet a larger percentage of the population actually read the constitution…at least all hope is not lost; we might get out of this rut sometime….
Disclaimer : this post was an expression of thought not a campaign for either side.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
BODACIOUS BLOGGER!!!
i have just seen very good news. i have been featured on the website forcoloredgurls.com as a bodacious blogger. you can check out the interview using the link kenyankairetu - bodacious blogger.
i would love to thank all my readers for making this happen.it has truly been a blessing to write and recieve your feedback on the various issues i bring up.the journey started,it has grown and continues to reach far and wide. this would not have been posssible were it not for you.i appreciate you all.as i continue writing i hope you will continue reading and giving the valuable feedback you always do.
cheers.
KenyanKairetu.
i would love to thank all my readers for making this happen.it has truly been a blessing to write and recieve your feedback on the various issues i bring up.the journey started,it has grown and continues to reach far and wide. this would not have been posssible were it not for you.i appreciate you all.as i continue writing i hope you will continue reading and giving the valuable feedback you always do.
cheers.
KenyanKairetu.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
MY ROLE MODEL...
recently i was watching the show 'sebuleni' hosted by Carol Mandi.the theme was re-invent your life. seeing as this was an informative kind of show, i had to get something from it. one of the speakers said something that struck me..."when we live comparing ourselves to the next person, we seize seeing for ourselves"
as i sat there it reminded me of something i needed to do.ever since we were young, somebody always asked us "who's your role model?" as usual i had the common array of Mandela,Mahatma Gandhi and other world leaders. it was good that i saw myself as being able to achieve that kind of impact.however i forgot that i was not them and they were not me,my impact in this world was not going to be theirs,their impact had been done, i needed to curve my own.personally, looking back i think having a role model is an element of comparison.what we want to do is have a certain character trait these people had, we don't really want to be them.they had their life and we have ours.we are all made for something,never the same thing....i will no longer want to chase the elusive dreams but rather take time to grow to be ME.
what i did was to assemble the qualities i admired in the various people i admired,i thought about them,made a choice of the realistic ones(there those i was never going to achieve e.g. being less opinionated) and i came up with my role model...
it was no longer a person i had seen, no longer about a book i had read but my new role model i decided would be 'the future me'. we all want to be better people one way or the other,be it spiritually, emotionally, physically or even mentally.considering there is only so far we can go as we are gifted differently we are the perfect role models for ourselves.there is the best person you can be,there is the talent and the gifting within you,there are dreams that inspire you ....let that keep you going.whenever i think of the future me...i see so many possibilities, i smile thinking of what could be.therein lies my strength and will to be better, knowing that i am aiming to be a better me and not a prototype of someone else.explore the possibilities of who you are and be the best 'you' that you can be.there is a God to guide your desires and your path toward your goal.drop the names and put your best as your aim.....
next time somebody asks me who's my role model I'll say "the future me,she is a strong,God-fearing woman,who dares,inspires and challenges me to move to a higher level in all areas of my life" for those who want to know how this said woman looks like you can always mail me we chat ...:-).i think of who i want to be in the next years and i work towards that,role models are a guiding light not my main lantern...
as i sat there it reminded me of something i needed to do.ever since we were young, somebody always asked us "who's your role model?" as usual i had the common array of Mandela,Mahatma Gandhi and other world leaders. it was good that i saw myself as being able to achieve that kind of impact.however i forgot that i was not them and they were not me,my impact in this world was not going to be theirs,their impact had been done, i needed to curve my own.personally, looking back i think having a role model is an element of comparison.what we want to do is have a certain character trait these people had, we don't really want to be them.they had their life and we have ours.we are all made for something,never the same thing....i will no longer want to chase the elusive dreams but rather take time to grow to be ME.
what i did was to assemble the qualities i admired in the various people i admired,i thought about them,made a choice of the realistic ones(there those i was never going to achieve e.g. being less opinionated) and i came up with my role model...
it was no longer a person i had seen, no longer about a book i had read but my new role model i decided would be 'the future me'. we all want to be better people one way or the other,be it spiritually, emotionally, physically or even mentally.considering there is only so far we can go as we are gifted differently we are the perfect role models for ourselves.there is the best person you can be,there is the talent and the gifting within you,there are dreams that inspire you ....let that keep you going.whenever i think of the future me...i see so many possibilities, i smile thinking of what could be.therein lies my strength and will to be better, knowing that i am aiming to be a better me and not a prototype of someone else.explore the possibilities of who you are and be the best 'you' that you can be.there is a God to guide your desires and your path toward your goal.drop the names and put your best as your aim.....
next time somebody asks me who's my role model I'll say "the future me,she is a strong,God-fearing woman,who dares,inspires and challenges me to move to a higher level in all areas of my life" for those who want to know how this said woman looks like you can always mail me we chat ...:-).i think of who i want to be in the next years and i work towards that,role models are a guiding light not my main lantern...
Friday, July 16, 2010
HOW TO BE A SANGUINE.
okay given the fact that am a live wire sanguine,then i guess there are some things about this temperament that i feel i need to share with the others(cholerics, melancholics and phlegmatics)
well here goes my tutorial...
1.Laugh - yes laugh, get amused by the smallest things,smile even when there is nothing to smile about or no reason to do so.yes you will look a bit nuts but ...a sanguine never minds what the next person is thinking.amusement is actually my most dominant mood,small things really do amuse me,some people tend to think am missing a few nuts,oh well,at least av got something to laugh about.
2.Forgive - sanguines are naturally light hearted people,quick to anger and forgiveness.rarely do they carry on pain and hurt,they let it go.grudges have no way of improving your life so move on and let go,no bitterness held.the lord God will deal with the offender,or so we believe.
3.Life is fun - boredom is nothing but torture to a sanguine (me included)nothing kills us more than this(okay there are other things which i won't mention today) .many are the times life just aint fun living so what do we do...make life fun for ourselves...point (1) comes in again here
4.Be a kid - yes take some time to just be the goofy person you are inside,do what the child inside is wanting to do.cholerics and melancholics especially,doing something witty is really ok...no harm.at this juncture i will say am still intending to go to uhuru park for a boat ride,yeah i know what your thinking...hold it,unless you are taking me,sawa?tell me what you think later on,for now let me be free to imagine,you should try it.the world is your oyster...
5.Do what you can handle not more - sanguines are gifted and can do most things, they will willingly offer to do a task but if they stand no chance of being the best at it(for reasons best known to them)then they wont keep at it,hence they pick their battles wisely.when they cannot do something they stop,they dont keep dancing around the same spot.i really think when Moses was taking the Israelites round the same area for 40 years all sanguines quit the journey when they went round a second journey.point is,things have to go somewhere,otherwise you will wait another 40 years :-) ...
6.Dont be shy - ok fine,the guy next to you has an intimidating look...so?take your chances you may just succeed who knows,dont miss out on something because you did not try it out.fear will stop you from achieving that which could have been your ultimate goal!!i sincerely believe that i would rather regret something i did than that which i did not do...
7.Confidence - ok sanguines may at times sound obnoxious but they are the people who believe they can move mountains,they believe they are capable of anything and will jump at any opportunity.even when a sanguine is not sure of something they will tell you they can do it,they will find out later how to do it.they never confess failure in their lives.never.no wonder most sanguines are 'wajuaji',there is a positive side to it.
8.Love yourself - clearly these people are their own praise machines.believe me in a sanguine's head they are probably the best at whatever they are doing,what they are passionate about.they never miss an opportunity to pat their own backs.i will admit i usually look at my photos and think "wow am pretty".its for survival purposes,too many people will try to bring you down, no need of adding yourself to that list.
9.Love people - people are a sanguines greatest asset,we cannot do without people around us.loneliness just is not palatable.take care of those around you, they truly come in handy besides who ever survived this world alone?
10.Learn to let go - like i said before,sanguines forgive easily.on this note they don't like frustration a.k.a stress.they will either do something about it or let go of it and wait for things to easen up.personally i don't see why i should stress myself over things beyond my control,those that i can do nothing about.after my maximum input,am done.that's the one time i am actually patient people...the precious one time.
11.Dream - i will admit we usually have our heads in the clouds but hey,atleast our heads are somewhere.dream as big as you can,take yourself off the ground.build what you want in your head.let your head be the birth centre of great things to come...remember to be confident in you own dreams.however don't forget to wake up and chase your dreams...
well i do hope the lessons from a sanguine are something to ponder on,well go ahead and be a sanguine just for a little while...see how it is....your thoughts on how the experience shall be would be interesting to hear.....have a sanguine weekend wont you?
regards,KairetuSanguine.
well here goes my tutorial...
1.Laugh - yes laugh, get amused by the smallest things,smile even when there is nothing to smile about or no reason to do so.yes you will look a bit nuts but ...a sanguine never minds what the next person is thinking.amusement is actually my most dominant mood,small things really do amuse me,some people tend to think am missing a few nuts,oh well,at least av got something to laugh about.
2.Forgive - sanguines are naturally light hearted people,quick to anger and forgiveness.rarely do they carry on pain and hurt,they let it go.grudges have no way of improving your life so move on and let go,no bitterness held.the lord God will deal with the offender,or so we believe.
3.Life is fun - boredom is nothing but torture to a sanguine (me included)nothing kills us more than this(okay there are other things which i won't mention today) .many are the times life just aint fun living so what do we do...make life fun for ourselves...point (1) comes in again here
4.Be a kid - yes take some time to just be the goofy person you are inside,do what the child inside is wanting to do.cholerics and melancholics especially,doing something witty is really ok...no harm.at this juncture i will say am still intending to go to uhuru park for a boat ride,yeah i know what your thinking...hold it,unless you are taking me,sawa?tell me what you think later on,for now let me be free to imagine,you should try it.the world is your oyster...
5.Do what you can handle not more - sanguines are gifted and can do most things, they will willingly offer to do a task but if they stand no chance of being the best at it(for reasons best known to them)then they wont keep at it,hence they pick their battles wisely.when they cannot do something they stop,they dont keep dancing around the same spot.i really think when Moses was taking the Israelites round the same area for 40 years all sanguines quit the journey when they went round a second journey.point is,things have to go somewhere,otherwise you will wait another 40 years :-) ...
6.Dont be shy - ok fine,the guy next to you has an intimidating look...so?take your chances you may just succeed who knows,dont miss out on something because you did not try it out.fear will stop you from achieving that which could have been your ultimate goal!!i sincerely believe that i would rather regret something i did than that which i did not do...
7.Confidence - ok sanguines may at times sound obnoxious but they are the people who believe they can move mountains,they believe they are capable of anything and will jump at any opportunity.even when a sanguine is not sure of something they will tell you they can do it,they will find out later how to do it.they never confess failure in their lives.never.no wonder most sanguines are 'wajuaji',there is a positive side to it.
8.Love yourself - clearly these people are their own praise machines.believe me in a sanguine's head they are probably the best at whatever they are doing,what they are passionate about.they never miss an opportunity to pat their own backs.i will admit i usually look at my photos and think "wow am pretty".its for survival purposes,too many people will try to bring you down, no need of adding yourself to that list.
9.Love people - people are a sanguines greatest asset,we cannot do without people around us.loneliness just is not palatable.take care of those around you, they truly come in handy besides who ever survived this world alone?
10.Learn to let go - like i said before,sanguines forgive easily.on this note they don't like frustration a.k.a stress.they will either do something about it or let go of it and wait for things to easen up.personally i don't see why i should stress myself over things beyond my control,those that i can do nothing about.after my maximum input,am done.that's the one time i am actually patient people...the precious one time.
11.Dream - i will admit we usually have our heads in the clouds but hey,atleast our heads are somewhere.dream as big as you can,take yourself off the ground.build what you want in your head.let your head be the birth centre of great things to come...remember to be confident in you own dreams.however don't forget to wake up and chase your dreams...
well i do hope the lessons from a sanguine are something to ponder on,well go ahead and be a sanguine just for a little while...see how it is....your thoughts on how the experience shall be would be interesting to hear.....have a sanguine weekend wont you?
regards,KairetuSanguine.
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